hello world, its been a long time.

there's nothing much to blog about these days since my everyday has pretty much been the same. now, the only thing that's changed is that i've started to work full time. And it isn't exactly what I call fun, because i'm doing the same thing everday. other departments make you frustrated, some people may insult your aethetic sense for a simple thing like a powerpoint slide, and some can have that smug expression on their face when you know they're just downright stupid for asking something that is not urgent at all. it really makes working life feel like crap with people like this around. i couldn't even imagine that people could be so inefficent. they talk and chit chat, i work non stop the whole day and get paid peanuts. yes peanuts.

and then i realise the difference of my life compared to theirs. its difficult and definitely full of shit. sometimes i don't even know what i'm doing. its like i'm just living cause i have to, working just because i have to. there's no room for talks no room for thinking, i just live like a living corpse.

for 3 months, i have had no contact with the majority of friends. it feels like we're drifting apart, we're all doing different things, and have hardly any time for each other cause its just too tiring. seriously everything is repetitive. we wake up, work, come back home feeling so tired just to fall asleep waiting for the next day to come and repeat itself.

for the past month, i've felt what its like, and i can't believe others can do this for years on and on. this is mad, crazy, and whatever other adjectives there are. this is not all. its getting more and more difficult to just do things i like. i end work at 6pm, and class starts at 7pm. with the traffic jams that occur everyday, how the hell can it be possible to make it on time? you tell me. why the fuck does the expressway have a jams on it as well? to make it worse, i'm getting too tired to even pay attention in class that i'm become stupid. i'm out of the house 13-15 hours per weekday. that leaves, 9 hours to eat, sleep and wash up. the "life" and "leisure" part has been kicked out of the schedule.

so, when i see people who are so laid back, enjoying life and not sparing a thought for their future, it really pisses me off. why is my life so difficult? how can you be so carefree? life is unfair. it really is.